Relationship Issues

Relationship Issues in the Hands

One of the areas of hand analysis that is fascinating is how many factors influence one's relationships. For example, the heart line which is covered on many of the blog postings here, determine how a person expresses feelings and how a person wants to be loved - with affection, with words, with space, with passion, through deep conversations, through short conversations, etc. So many choices depending on which heart line type(s) you have.

Fascinatingly, there are many other hand markings that also influence how one approaches relationships. The types of fingerprints can be influential, as well as how long the head line is, what the hand shape is, how many lines you have.

People with very few lines (like between 3 and 9) tend to be 'bottom line get to the point' type of people who prefer to be communicated with in bullet points (this is a bit of simplification!) However, a person with many lines in the hands (15 or more) tends to want to share way more information that somebody with very few lines wants to hear. Just knowing that, already you can see that different approaches to comunication could result in one feeling loved or not. "You don't listen to me" a person with many lines may feel. And that could translate to feeling 'unloved' or that there is a 'relationship issue.'

A person with very few lines may feel the person with many lines is 'overcommunicating." TMI (too much information - I think that phrase was made up by somebody with very few lines!) So the person with very few lines may feel unloved because they feel the person with many lines doesn't understand what 'effective communication' looks like to a person with few lines.

And this is only one aspect of what is in the hands. This is by way of saying that patience, understanding and compassion are so helpful when somebody communicates in a way that doesn't match your style. And maybe if the issue is few lines vs many lines, this little bit of info can help you be more understanding in your relationships. If you have very few lines, maybe you could tell others you want to be communicated with in bullet points.

If you have many lines, maybe you can share how much you appreciate somebody hanging in there with you while you "get to the point more slowly with more information."

Bending Over Backwards Line

Bending Over Backwards Line

In the hand print posted here, see the line that curves down off the heart line? The heart line is the one closest to the fingers.

It's not a usual pattern to see an extra line bending away from the heart line so this is a special marking. When that happens, the owner of this line 'bends over backwards' to meet the needs

of other people at their own expense. Another way to phrase this is that the owner of this line might 'rearrange' his or her emotional state to take care of another's emotional state.

For example, if Joan owns this bending over backwards line, she may choose not speak her feelings to her husband when he says something hurtful. Instead, internally she 'rearranges' her own feelings to take care of his by telling herself, "He's tired. He didn't really mean to hurt my feelings."

Or Bill may own this line and feels uncomfortable saying out loud that he's tolerating his son's ranting when what Bill wants really is to tell his son to quiet down, that the ranting isn't going to get him what he wants. Bill rearranges his own emotional states, bends over backwards to not hurt his son's feelings or risk more anger. But the cost to Bill is stuffing his feelings.

On the master path, recognizing you are not speaking up, not speaking from your heart, rearranging your emotional state is a benefit. Then you can choose: do you take the risk to speak your heart or let somebody else's emotional needs take precedence over yours?

Fingerprints - some medical information

Fingerprints - some medical information
Based on medical research fingerprints are fully formed somewhere between 16-20 weeks after conception, before some other organs in the body. And they never change, which we all know.

The volar pads that form the fingerprints are raised at different levels on the fingers, meaning that whorls are raised on the finger the highest amount where arches are flat and don't raise up on the volar pads. Peacocks and composites follow closely behind whorls, then loops, tented arches and arches. So the ranking system used to identify Life Purpose (highest ranked) and Life Lesson (lowest ranked) is based on the formation of the fingerprints on the volar pads.

But fingerprints are different from any other part of the hands because they don't change. So I understand fingerprints to be much more of an identification of a person's soul agreement. I don't lump them in with other hand markings because they stand on their own. That doesn't mean I don't include other hand markings in a session with clients. What it means is that from birth to death, regardless of any other hand markings, there is a reason for this person to be here and it's tangible.

There are other parts of the body that are just as significant for identification and don't change the same as fingerprints: voice, retina, walk, eye color, 8 basal cells at the base of the spine - just for what I arleady know about. And I'm sure there are other things I don't know.
All fingers matter because each of the 10 has a very specific purpose - including master and student path. And if a finger is the 'life lesson' finger, it creates valuable insights for a person to know obstacles that can be faced, understood, consciously chosen to make changes one step at a time. The combination of life purpose fingers and life lesson fingers creates an even more sophisticated understanding of what truly creates the highest possibility of satisfaction, joy and soul fulfillment. I'm grateful to Richard Unger for this addition to Hand Analysis in his way. It's helped me know myself more and many, many clients.

Your Hands, Your Relationships

What does the hand say about relationships?

All over your hands are markings that provide information about what you want in relationships: how you communicate, how long you spend solving problems, ho wmuch you want to talk about feelings or don't, what being loved looks like to you, and especially your Life Purpose and how that affects your joy and happiness. Your fingerprints identify your Life Purpose and Life Lesson.

The head line: this is the horizontal line that begins on the thumb side of the hand and goes across toward the outer edge.

For example, let's say you have a long head line and your partner has a short one. Long head lined people like more information before making a decision. Short head line people tend to make decisions with 2 or 3 pieces of data vs the 10-12 a long head line person may want. Can you imagine this could cause frustration in relationship? Making a decision about a vacation is up for you. The long head lined person wants to investigate options, such as which island in Hawaii or even considering Fiji. The short head line person only wants to choose between two hotels on one island. Good news here is the long head lined person can research and present choices. But if there are too many choices, the short head lined person may just blow it off, pick one whether or not that is what he or she really wanted because too much data doesn't interest them.

This is just a small example and there are other variables, of course, because only one marking in the hands isn't enough to really establish the similarities and differences between people.

No two hands are the same, not even yours left and right hands. So each person approaches everything from their own perspective. Each person's viewpoint is theirs and it's not really appropriate to try to insist or encourage or manipulate them into trying to take on your viewpoint. Compormises yes, but giving up one's needs based on their hand markings can cause resentment in relationships.

The right to have Desires

The right to have desires

One of the heart lines, the Passionate, has the easiest time identifying how he or she feels. The other heart line types are more challenged in this particular skill. The Passionate Heart Line is the line closest to the fingers, begins under the pinkie and ends under the middle finger. It actually curves up and touches the middle finger.

The Passionate can become very frustrated when the other heart line types don't know what they want or don't ask for it. It makes no sense to a Passionate that anybody would believe they didn't have 'the right to desires.' But the Romantic Idealist, the most common partner for the Passionate, is THE most challenged heart line to identify and ask for what he or she wants. The Romantic Idealist is a long heart line and straight one that ends under the inex finger.

When people have one hand with a Passionate and one hand with a Romantic Idealist, there could be confusion about identifying desires and expressing them out loud. Maybe on some topics the Passionate hand takes charge and is able to say, "i know I want to go to the beach" with fervor and energy. And at other times, the Romantic Idealist is in charge and analyzes a situation, challenged to make a decision. It may sound like, "I'd like to go to the beach but it's cloudy today and I'm not sure what time the sun is going to come out so that means I need layers of clothes. Maybe we shouldn't go until after 11:30."

When these two heart line types are in relationship, learning how to listen to each one, honoring it and yet allowing both heart line types to have a voice is important for relationship success.

You can learn more about your heart line types through a variety of products at my web site found at www.handsoncompany.com/products.html. Scroll down to the section on heart lines ad see the books, audios and songs that represents the heart line types.

Communication is the bottom line

Communication is the Bottom Line

For each person, how you communicate verbally and non-verbally tells everybody else something about you. Are you more verbally expressive or are you more the quiet type? Does your body language speak more loudly than your words speak? When you are happy, does it show on your face or do you just feel it inside and keep your facial expression 'in tact'? Are you a person who expresses through body language by reacting clearly to every thing and other people are easily aware of what is happening for you?

In the hands, there are many markings that each person has but one specifically, the heart line, which is the horizontal line closest to the fingers that begins under the pinkie, identifies your non-verbal expression type.

If it curves up and touches either the index or middle finger, then you tend to show how you feel through your body language and facial expressions.

If your heart line is straight and DOESN'T curve up but just goes across the hand from under the pinkie towards to the middle finger or index finger, then you are much more careful about body language. Expressing your feelings doesn't make you feel comfortable. People can't read your facial expressions because you've gotten very good, organically, at not showing how you feel.

Neither of these styles is right or wrong. They are what they are. And judging somebody else for not expressing like you isn't helpful. They are who they are and are being true to themselves.

It's All About Relationships

It's All About Relationships

Isn't that really the truth about eveything in our life? Your relationship with yourself is teh basis for all other relationships. Psychologists talk about that whatever you like about yourself you see in others as a benefit. What you don't like about yourself you see in others as being something you don't like about them. Psychologists call it 'projection' - where you project your own feelings onto another person.

The Law of Attraction says that whatever you focus on you get more of that. So if your relationships with others aren't working for you, what are you focusing on? Are you paying more attention go what you don't like about somebody else or more attention to what's working in the relationship?

Combining these two theories - projection and the law of attraction - it pretty much boils down to this: how you feel about yourself has a huge effect on your relationships with everybody else. So becoming even more aware of how you feel about yourself, what you like, don't like and what you project onto others will provide huge clues to success or not in relationships.

And there is so much information in your hands that identifies what motivates you, what you want, how you want to be treated, your perspective, viewpoint and filter through which you look at others and how compatible or not they are with you.